Tearing my robes

In the old testament, this seemed a common practice. To come and humble myself before an almighty God, desiring His presence and desiring to know His will … I feel like I should be tearing my robes. Of course though, a friend of mine pointed out that our clothes are probably harder to tear than they were back then, so my efforts might prove fruitless.

But I still think there is something to doing something out of the ordinary in times of desperation. Fasting is something I frequently enjoy. But this time… this time requires something different.

Yesterday Pastor Chan talked about how the Chinese congregations had started 6am prayer meetings to pray for the future of the church and other things. He talked about how directly after, he came under spiritual attack. He got into a pretty bad looking car accident and survived. Truly God protected him because his work for the Lord was not yet done.

Recently I had been talking to a friend of mine about being disciplined in seeking discipline, being accountable for seeking accountability, etc. Now I feel that God is pushing me to extreme discipline. In the situation that I am in, I need to humble myself more than I ever have before and need to seek God’s will more than I ever have before.

And so this week I have committed myself to an hour of prayer and devotion, 6am with the rest of the church to pray for God’s direction. It’s funny because after I decided this I found that this would be academically one of the busiest weeks. And a few minutes ago I found another assignment that is due tomorrow that I had entirely forgotten about. Now, would I call this spiritual warfare? Maybe, I don’t know, but it sure makes my commitment to God a lot harder.

In today’s devotion, verses that spoke most were:

Many are the plans in a man’s heat, but it is the LORD’S purpose that prevails.

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

A man’s spirit sustains him in sickness, but a crushed spirit who can bear?

A man lacking in judgment strikes hands in pledge and puts up security for his neighbor.



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